Chapter 6: My Mouth No Be My Own

My mood just spoil, but since Papa still dey receive am, I let Ngozi help me go parlor.

I dey drag my leg, face dey strong. I wear my old ankara, no makeup, just raw pain.

Inside, Papa face strong, Dr. Ifedike own full of guilt. If Papa vex for real, e for worse pass this one.

Na silence full room. Only the tick-tock of wall clock dey talk.

From outside, goat dey bleat and small pikin dey shout, but inside, everywhere just dey quiet like grave.

Dr. Ifedike, wetin you talk sef?

I dey wait, dey cross my hand. Him dey sweat.

"Papa. Divine Doctor." I sit down like say I dey meet stranger, my voice cold.

Even Ngozi dey stand by door, dey eye am like say she fit bite if e try nonsense.

Since I enter, him eye never leave me. As I talk, him face dull, hand dey shake.

E dey shift chair, dey rub him palm, dey try form strong man.

All the wahala for him mind just come out for one word: "Sorry."

E reach me. Na only 'sorry' him get? My own heart dey stone.

"Why Divine Doctor come? We don already divorce. No need for more talk." My voice cold, but he dey restless.

I dey press my voice low, make e know say nothing dey move me again.

"A Yao, I never gree for divorce. I know say you misunderstand. I come explain."

He dey beg, dey bend head, dey try find my eye.

"You go hear me?" He rush come, wan hold my hand, but Ngozi block am.

Ngozi sharp, she stand for front like soldier, dey protect me.

"Nothing to talk. Na only divorce I want." Na only that one I need. I no be mumu—misunderstanding or not, I see clear.

I dey press my lips, dey look ground. No space for talk.

"Divine Doctor, my daughter stubborn, no reach your level. Make we just separate." Papa talk as if e dey scold me, but every word dey protect me.

Papa voice soft, but e dey strong. E dey form shield for me.

He no know why I want divorce, but he know say I no dey wrong. He dey support me.

For that moment, I dey proud. Even as my chest dey pain me, I dey feel love.

"Papa-in-law, Ifedike know him mistake. I beg, make A Yao give me another chance. I no go let her suffer again." He dey beg serious. Ngozi shift, allow am hold my hand.

He dey kneel small, hand dey tremble. For my mind, I dey remember all the nights he dey my side, all the times he choose another.

As I wan push am, I suddenly see say my mouth no dey my control: "Papa, I go follow am first, hear wetin he wan talk."

For my mind, I dey shout—wetin be this? Na juju? Wetin dey happen? E be like say person tie my tongue with black soap. Fear dey catch me.

But my mouth talk am like say na my mind.

I look Dr. Ifedike with anger, vex dey boil. So he even drug me join!

My eye dey wide, I dey suspect say maybe na small medicine dey mix for tea. All this one na story for another day.

But no matter how I vex, I no show am. He no fit look me for eye, just hold my hand tight, tell Papa bye-bye.

I dey follow am outside, my leg dey heavy. Tears dey gather, but I dey swallow am like dry eba. My own story never end, but I sabi say na me go write the next line for myself. Who go dey my corner when next wahala land?