Chapter 2: Mumu for the Crowd

As I dey desperate, I rush go where dem drop bags, grab my wife purse, dey find her phone.

My heart dey pound. I dey check bag, dey open zip, dey shake. My hand dey sweat, I dey curse under breath.

"Wetin you dey do?"

Her voice sharp, e cut through music. I pause, look up, see her dey eye me bad.

My hand dey shake, I dey fumble, she snatch her bag back.

She drag am with force, her ring catch my finger. Pain bite me, I no even send.

I shout, "If you no believe me, on your phone, call papa. Ambulance no dey come, we need rush mama go hospital ourselves!"

My voice crack. I dey beg, tears dey push me. I look around, but nobody gree support.

My wife just pass her phone give one babe behind her. The babe just tuck am inside her shirt, puff chest. "If you get mind, come collect am—no be only mouth."

Na wah! She go hide phone for bra, dey do security. She even bounce small, her friends dey hail her. I no believe say na this level we reach.

One guy hiss, "Sade marry you, na flower fall inside... you sabi."

The guy hiss, wave hand like fly dey disturb am. The crowd laugh, even one big guy for back spray groundnut for floor.

Everybody burst, "Ode!"

Dem chorus am, the thing sound like secondary school, wahala dey sweet dem.

"Sade na blessing for you, you no even value am. Na to lock her for house you sabi."

She dey do like Queen, dem dey form praise singers. Me, I dey wonder how I take jam these people.

I no know any of these people. Na my wife even drag me come make I pay bill, make she show off.

I just dey replay everything for my mind. I pay gate fee, order drink, yet na so dem dey treat me.

"You sure say you no dey go?" I ask.

I dey try reason am with her, my mind dey break. Some people dey eye me, some dey jeer.

She roll her eyes. "If I no fit flex tonight, even if Oba of Benin get heart attack, e no concern me."

That talk weak me. Some people even snap finger, dey shout "mad o!" Na so reunion dey sweet dem. My anger dey rise, my mind dey dark.

"No wahala, Sade. No go regret am."

I talk am with all the pain wey dey my chest. My voice no loud but e cut reach everywhere. I stand up, eye dem one by one.