Chapter 10: Broken Phone, Broken Heart

7

As I commot from bathroom, I check time.

I wipe face, carry phone, see say na 1 a.m. Sleep dey catch my eye, but mind still dey hot. Sometimes, na these midnight hours wey mind go begin wander.

'Na 1 a.m. now, he suppose don sleep.'

I talk am for myself, as I off light. For Naija, 1 a.m. na spirit time. House quiet sotay even mosquito no dey fly.

'Abeg, forget WhatsApp group. To hug my husband sleep na the main thing.'

I dey plan make I hug am, maybe peace go enter body. WhatsApp drama fit wait till morning. My heart dey beg for small comfort.

But before I reach bed, something dark hit my face quick.

I no expect am. As I turn, gbam! Something jam my face. My hand fly go cheek, eyes dey blink fast. I dey try understand wetin happen.

I hold my face, squat, tears dey my eye. I use one eye see the thing wey hit me for floor.

Pain dey bite me, tears dey gather. I bend pick the thing, na phone. I just shake head. My luck no dey today.

Na my phone.

As for who throw am... no need guess.

Only one person get the liver—Somto. Na only him fit vex reach this level, throw phone anyhow.

'You dey craze?'

I shout am, voice loud. I dey vex, but pain dey cover anger.

'Wetin I do you again?'

My voice dey crack. I dey look am, hope say e go answer. For my mind, I dey replay all the wahala.

I raise voice. As I talk, pain hold my face.

The pain sharp, but I bone face. I no want make Somto see say I weak.

But I no expect say Somto vex pass me. He just kick blanket, waka comot bed with bare foot. He begin throw anything wey e fit see for floor.

The level of anger surprise me. He scatter room, throw pillow, toss book. Noise loud, window shake. I dey worry say neighbor fit call security.

Noise come loud sotay everybody for compound hear am.

True true, compound people no dey sleep. Window dey open, I hear footsteps, slippers dey slap ground.

My stepfather rush enter with wrapper, look everywhere, just blame me:

Oga no even ask question. Wrapper tie for waist, eyes red. Na me he blame first. For Naija, na woman first collect blame for house wahala.

'This kind night, you no dey sleep? You don start wahala again?'

The accusation heavy. I dey try explain, but my mouth dry. My stepfather just dey shake head.

My mama rush come, dey fear, ask me:

Mama enter, wrapper for chest, face full of worry. She dey check Somto, dey check me, dey look broken things. Na only prayer remain for her mouth.

'Titi, wetin happen?'

Her voice soft, almost like whisper. She dey beg for peace.

I just hiss small.

I no get energy to talk. I hiss, face away. My own story tire me.

How I wan explain? E hard.

To talk true for Naija family no dey easy. If you try, dem go say you dey look for excuse. I just bone.

Just like the first month wey I follow my mama enter Okafor compound after she remarry. I try please Somto, dey pet am. Anything he want, just look me, next second I go bring am.

I dey remember that first month—how I dey run errand, dey beg for smile. I dey buy meat pie, dey share sweet. But nothing work. Somto no dey break.

But one day, I mistake, annoy am. In front of my stepfather and mama, he just throw spoon for my face.

Spoon fly, land for my cheek. My face hot, tears wan commot. For front of elders, na big disgrace. My heart cut.

I look my mama, wan explain, but my stepfather just shout:

I dey open mouth, wan talk, but stepfather voice choke the room. No space for my own side.

'If you dey chop, chop. No dey cause wahala. Our family no dey talk for table. Maybe you never know, but from now, remember.'

The rule land heavy. For Okafor house, silence dey table. No time for talk or drama. I gree, hold my pain.

Nobody wan hear my own side. Last last, I just respect myself, apologize to Somto.

I swallow pride, talk sorry, even though my mind dey bleed. For Naija, sometimes apology na survival.

That day be like today, two years later. All my struggle, e no change anything. Who hate me, still hate me.

I dey see say struggle no dey always pay. If person no like you, e no go ever like you. I dey try, I dey fail, but life dey move.