Chapter 11: Endings and Answers

The night we got back together, my heart was calm as water. I opened that breakup post for the first time in a long while.

The hostel was quiet except for the distant sound of devotional songs from a temple nearby. My phone glowed in the darkness, lighting up the old wounds.

Scrolled from beginning to end.

Every page, every insult, was like a wound I’d forgotten about. But this time, I read with a strange detachment.

Besides the nasty words, I also saw bits and pieces of my past.

[Did Rohan and Ananya break up today, day six.]

[No, they even went to see a movie. Why does that chamchi deserve it?]

Why? I remember that was the first movie we saw together. I had to ask him several times before he agreed. He said he didn’t like movies, especially the comedies I picked.

So that day, I bought tickets for the latest three-hour documentary. Even though I really hated documentaries, even though I was suffering from my period and had no energy, I still watched the whole thing with him, focused the whole time.

I’d stuffed painkillers into my bag, sipped Frooti to keep my strength up. Every time he glanced at me, I forced a smile.

[Did Rohan and Ananya break up today]

[No, I heard someone saw that bitch jump up and hug the college hunk.]

I remembered that day, too—the hug was just relief at passing my midterms, but no one cared about the truth. The post twisted everything.

[Did Rohan and Ananya break up today]

[No. Look how silly she is, lining up to buy chai for the college hunk. What kind of girlfriend is this? Isn’t she just a chamchi?]

I’d stood in line for forty minutes, clutching his stainless steel flask, sweating under the May sun, just so he could have his favourite ginger chai before his coding competition.

[Did Rohan and Ananya break up today]

[No, but the college hunk was so handsome at the coding competition. I heard that girlfriend couldn’t even get a pass. So funny, is she really the girlfriend?]

I waited outside the auditorium, sketchbook in hand, hoping for a glimpse of him onstage. But the guards never let me in.

Looking at the photos on the website, seeing the humble and real me in each one, my eyes turned red.

These people seemed right. Everything I did—wasn’t I just a chamchi?

All these years, what have I been doing?

The question echoed in my mind, louder than all the taunts. For the first time, I didn’t feel ashamed. Just tired.

Suddenly, I woke up.

I realised one thing. It seems… I can’t forgive him anymore.

Even if he deleted Priya, I still have to break up with him.