Chapter 8: The Life I Chose

Derek took me home. The pressure around him eased, not as sharp and cold as before.

He drove in silence, city lights flickering past the windows. The tension from earlier seemed to fade, replaced by something softer, sadder.

"What made you think of getting married?" Derek’s gaze lingered on my face. "Who was it that said she’d never get married in this life?"

He grinned, the old mischief flickering in his eyes. I looked away, remembering the words I’d spat at him—promises I’d thought were ironclad.

Just some harsh words I’d said during the breakup.

I smiled quietly. "Didn’t expect to meet someone I liked so much—probably what they call fate."

Actually, Lucas and I didn’t meet through a dating app.

That was a lie I told Derek, hoping to keep things simple. The truth was more complicated—and more ordinary.

At that time, I’d been transferred to work under Lucas for a few months. He was the most capable boss I’d ever seen—socially adept, strong in execution, managing a temporary team in perfect order.

He had a way of making chaos look easy. People trusted him. I found myself watching him in meetings, studying the way he handled pressure. It was comforting, in a way Derek never was.

His ease made it seem like he was born to lead, giving me the illusion that he and Derek were the same kind of person.

But Lucas was softer, gentler. He brought in Dunkin’ every Friday, remembered everyone’s birthday, and never let a meeting run late.

I’m a sucker for looks. Lucas’s features were delicate and reserved; when he looked at me intently, it felt like a gentle, warm breeze.

His blue eyes crinkled when he smiled, and when he laughed, it was warm—like sunlight on a chilly morning. It made me feel safe, wanted.

The first time I saw him, I thought of Derek.

I compared them—couldn’t help it. Old habits die hard. But Lucas was a different kind of man. He was good in a way Derek never tried to be.

Derek was also recognized as a handsome man in our circle. His handsomeness was sharp, like a winter wind with icy thorns, piercing to the bone. Exactly my type.

It was the kind of beauty that drew people in, even as it kept them at arm’s length. I’d been obsessed, once.

So I quietly liked him for many years.

It was a secret I held close, even when it hurt. I thought if I waited long enough, he’d choose me. But some things aren’t meant to last.

But who says you can only like one person in your life?

Maybe love really is just timing. I met Lucas when I needed someone gentle, someone real.

Lucas was unmarried and single, from a modest family, with no connections. No connections was good; he was someone I could actually reach.

He made me feel normal, like I belonged somewhere. With him, there were no secrets, no games—just two people trying to build something small and good.