Chapter 3: Blocked, Unblocked, and the Birthday Wahala

04.

One night, we talk say we go play basketball for town next day.

I spend two hours do makeup, pack water, message am from outside: [I dey your downstairs. Where you dey?]

I no wan dull, so I come dey wait like security. My mind dey high—today na today!

Five minutes later, he reply: [Something just come up. I no fit play today.]

He no dey cancel unless e serious. I come dey worry: [Wetin happen?]

No reply.

My heart just sink. I waka go house, all my ginger don die.

I collapse for sofa, just dey dull.

I off wig, throw am for bed. Even phone no fit distract me. That kain disappointment dey pain.

Later, I reason say at least he tell me before, so no too bad.

I try find one series watch, but nothing dey enter. Na so heartbreak dey start, small small.

But that night, I see one classmate post picture, her hand dey hospital drip. All the feelings wey I bottle since morning just rush me.

I open group chat—everybody dey hail Zainab Musa, dey wish her quick recovery. As I see her name, my chest squeeze. That one wey Musa always dey form gentle for am.

Na Zainab Musa post am—the only babe wey Musa Garba ever close to for secondary school. Everybody believe say he like her. When she get boyfriend for second year, dem no too close again.

I remember all the times dem go library together. My friends dey tease me say I dey jealous for nothing, but e no easy.

That time, Musa result drop small, people just believe the story.

Rumour fly for school that year. Some say na heartbreak, some say na focus. Na only God know truth.

So the ‘something’ wey keep am na say he go see her.

Jealousy just dey my chest. I no fit hold am: [You go hospital today?]

I bite my lip, dey look phone, dey hope say e no go vex.

Wetin be your relationship with her… I type, delete, type again, but I no send.

Shame dey catch me. I no wan overdo.

He reply quick: [Yes. My friend sick, I go help look after am.]

E answer like say na nothing, but me, my mind no rest.

He answer am like say e no mean anything, all my vex just weak like say I dey punch foam.

Which kind friend you dey go hospital go look after by yourself?

[You no get anything wey you wan tell me?]

[Na my private matter. I no dey tell people my private life.]

For him eye, she be private matter. Me, I just be ‘others.’

After almost two months of dey hang out, I think say we be padi, but for am, I still be outsider wey just be classmate.

[Musa Garba, you dey craze, you know?]

Before he reply, I block am sharp, then throw my phone under pillow, like say e fit block my feelings too.

I hiss, drop phone. Na me carry wahala come myself, but I no care. I block am sharp.

My papa and mama dey work for another city, so I dey house alone.

As only child, I don get used to dey handle my wahala myself. This kain heartbreak dey make house cold pass rain season.

I just dey waka for house, dey play game, dey order food from mama put.

Sometimes, I go just dey hear generator noise outside, dey wish say e fit drown my thoughts. Smell of fried plantain dey float from neighbour window, but food no dey hungry me.

My padi Blessing Okoro no fit watch me dey dull, she dey call me everyday or carry me go waka, gym, or do volunteer work for church.

Blessing na real friend—always dey ginger me, even when my eye red from cry.

Na only her sabi my gist with Musa Garba.

We dey gist for her room, she go give me zobo, dey yarn me make I forget guy, say Naija boys too dey form. Sometimes, suya smell go fill the room, fan dey hum for ceiling, and Blessing go throw one proverb like, “You dey play with fire, you go chop pepper soup last last.” I go laugh small, but heart still dey pain me.

I no expect say Musa Garba go find me by himself.

E shock me, because na stubborn guy. Even if e pain am, e no dey show.

05.

My birthday come the same time wey WAEC result drop.

Blessing take charge, do birthday party for my house, invite our secondary school people.

She scatter everywhere—decorate room with balloons, buy small chops, even bring DJ wey sabi play old school. She order puff-puff, suya, small chops, zobo for cooler, and even jollof rice wey dey scatter everywhere.

People dey come, dey gist for sofa. Music dey blast, smell of fried chicken and zobo dey mix for air, people dey shout over loudspeaker.

Doorbell ring. I open, see Femi Adamu with him play-play face. I joke, “Which mumu face be this? Shift jor.”

Femi always dey run cruise. I no dey ever fit vex for am for long.

I try close door, Femi panic, grab my hand, dey beg: “Amina, abeg no vex!” He rush give me gift. “Happy birthday!”

Because of gift, I open door well—na so I see Musa Garba stand beside Femi, hold gift, eyes down, just dey look where Femi hand still dey my wrist.

The thing shock me. I try reason wetin bring am come. My body freeze small, but I compose face.

Two weeks since I see am last.

That kind silent moment dey always get as e be—my heart dey race, but my face dey calm.

Air just dey one kind. Femi rush give me Musa Garba gift, make excuse: “I jam Musa this morning for ball, as we all be classmates, I carry am come.”

Femi sabi as e dey go—always dey act like chief mediator. I just smile small, collect the two gifts.

I check the gift—correct brand, the kind wey person dey book three days ahead—no talk, look Musa Garba. He don remove eye from Femi hand, our eye jam.

He talk, voice soft pass normal: “Happy birthday.”

Na the first time I hear am talk like that. E be like say apology dey hide for back of the greeting.

I hold myself: “Thanks.” Then I open door for dem enter.

My mind dey play amebo, but I maintain composure. I no wan fall hand.

As he pass me, Musa Garba pause small, I feel say him dey look me.

That small pause na big thing for person like Musa—e mean say e get plenty for mind.

“Musa, come here, this thing dey sweet!”

Femi call am. Musa hesitate, then waka go.

I breathe out. Blessing waka come: “He come beg you?”

I shake head, voice low: “No, na Femi carry am come.”

Blessing whisper: “I never hear say he dey go party wey dem no invite am.”

She dey give me side eye. I just smile—me sef shock.

E touch me. I look Musa Garba for the other side, na that time he look up catch my eye.

I rush look away.

I go adjust wrapper for waist, form say I dey arrange cake, but my heart dey do shaku shaku for my chest.

Person shout, “Result don drop!” Everybody rush check phone, dey happy.

All the girls dey scream, guys dey jump. I just stand one side, dey check my phone with my heart for hand.

“Class rep, which university you enter?” Femi ask.

Everybody look me.

I no hide: “Uyo University.”

Pride dey my voice. All my late night reading don pay.

“Hey, you and Musa dey same school!”

As Femi talk am, everybody dey look me and Musa Garba.

Na that time gist go spread—two of us for Uyo, who know wetin fit happen?

Last last, Blessing talk: “Birthday girl, come cut cake,” tension scatter.

Everybody rush come snap, laugh, spray cake for my face. Naija birthday no dey dull.

After food, person say make we play truth or dare.

Bottle point Musa Garba. He pick truth.

People shout, dey hail. Some dey beg make e pick dare, but Musa just raise hand, pick truth.

Blessing look me, then smile give Musa: “Why you choose Uyo University?”

She sabi the answer, but e wan hear am from him mouth.

He sit for my front, look like say na me he dey look: “Because I like am.”

The whole room quiet, only fan dey make noise. My ear dey hot. People eye big, mouth open. I dey blush like tomato wey sun burn.

Person laugh. My heart dey beat.

He add: “Uyo University finance dey top. I like the course.”

That add-on save am, but everybody don hear the main thing.

After party, I come back see say Musa Garba still dey.

He see me, waka come, him body dey smell small fruit wine, voice rough: “Amina, abeg no hate me.”

For that small moment, all the old gist just fly. I no even fit vex again. I just dey look the guy, dey smile like mumu.