My Classmate Set Me Up / Chapter 1: My Name Don Spoil
My Classmate Set Me Up

My Classmate Set Me Up

Author: Emily Valdez


Chapter 1: My Name Don Spoil

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After one ajebutter babe finish me with her wahala, I go online ask: how person fit make the person wey bully am collect the worst punishment?

You know Naija—when wahala choke, na online we dey run, find small sense, pour our mind. I just dey vex as I dey type that post, na so breeze from broken louvre window blow my curtain, and my neighbor pikin dey shout, "Mummy, where my slippers?" for corridor. I no even send, na that kain tiredness wey dey sweet and pain your chest at once.

The answer wey I get na, "Maybe if you become the best for the whole city during WAEC. If school bully you, na big slap for the education board face."

E shock me say people sabi even dey reason this kind revenge. For Naija, to shame person for public, especially for education, na proper punishment. I read the reply two times, my mind dey do like say I don chop one hot slap. I just dey reason, "Kai, if dem see say I pass everybody, shege go enter their eye."

As I see am, I catch the message sharp sharp. So, after dem bully me again, I just carry my answer script for exam, submit am blank, right before the big exam.

As I dey waka go submit blank script, my hand dey shake, but I press my lips. For inside my heart, wahala dey boil. I dey imagine dem go dey wonder, "Why this girl throway her chance like this?" But me, I wan make everybody see say the thing don too much.

I cry for front of principal. My voice break as I talk, my knees dey weak, tears just dey drop for ground like rain for new zinc. "Sorry, Principal. I don disappoint you. Dem dey bully me for this school since, now I no even fit go school again, no fit write exam."

Tears wey I never even know say I fit cry before just rush me. Principal dey look me, him face hard but him eye dey soft small. Some teachers gather, dey whisper. One aunty pat my back small, say, "Pele, my pikin." I just dey shake head, voice crack as I dey talk.

As I expect, next day, everywhere for our small local government scatter.

People dey phone each other, everybody dey talk for market, for church, even for mosque compound. All the parents dey vex. For school gate, boys dey gist, dey shout, "You hear wetin happen? That girl wey sabi book don break down."

Government people start special operation to catch all the bad eggs—just because of me.

Everywhere, local government officials and even some community elders begin call meeting. Security men dey waka round school. Even PTA chairman dey form busy, dey try show say dem serious. People dey fear say wahala go spread reach dem pikin head.

Because as I become UNILAG hope, na me be the school poster girl, na me be their achievement for the year.

Everybody for area sabi say na me be that girl wey dey always collect prize during assembly. My mama dey always show my picture for family WhatsApp group. The shame for school dey touch everybody, na so you go hear, "Ah, see wetin one girl fit cause for whole local government."

After dem bully me for school, I go post online, dey ask how I fit make the person wey do am chop the worst punishment.

Na for Facebook group I drop am—one group wey dey full of students dey vent about school wahala. I no too trust am, so I use fake account. My heart still dey beat as I post am, my hand dey sweat.

The post disappear quick, but during night prep, I see one coded reply:

"Maybe if you become the top scorer for the whole city during WAEC. If school bully you, na big slap for the education board face."

The reply short, but the meaning long. I hold my phone, dey reason say the matter big. My mind dey fly go future, how my name fit enter radio if I shine for WAEC. E be like say somebody wey sabi Naija school matter drop am, because na so dem dey respect result for here.

I sharply delete the post.

I no even reason am, just rush delete so my own wahala no go reach home. For Naija, gossip dey fly like mosquito, and I no want make my mama hear say I dey seek revenge.

My seatmate, Morayo, bend come my side, talk for voice wey no too loud, no too soft, "Zainab, abeg stop dey press phone, teacher dey look you."

As she bend reach my side, I smell her coconut oil. Her coconut oil smell mix with dust and chalk, dey follow me everywhere. Her voice dey calm, like person wey dey try form big sister. Na small smile she put for face, but her eye dey sharp, dey monitor everybody move.

The class quiet, na only our form teacher dey mark paper for front. He no even notice me before.

You fit hear pin drop, na only ceiling fan dey make kpa kpa kpa for background. Some people dey write, some dey sleep. Na so Morayo words just break the silence like small thunder.

But as Morayo talk that thing, he just sense say something dey. He drop pen for table with vex, waka come my seat, stop for my front.

He eye don change, that kain teacher eye wey go just catch person like thief. Na so he waka come my seat with him big shoe, stop for my front, hand for waist.

He stretch hand: "Bring am."

The hand strong like police. He no shout, but the voice sharp. I just freeze, dey look am.

Before you know, everybody for class dey look my side.

Even people wey dey sleep before don open eye. Some dey whisper, some dey nod. Everybody dey expect make drama start.

All of dem start dey whisper for themselves.

E get one girl for back wey dey always chew bubble gum, she just carry face come my side, dey whisper, "She don start again."

"Morayo don already warn her, she still dey play. She deserve am."

"You never hear? Why she come from city if her life good? Na because her papa dey owe people, dem chase am."

You go think say everybody get the full gist of my life; gossip wey I no even tell Morayo, dem sabi am. Na Naija school be that, news dey waka fast.

"Dem say her mama dey sell drinks for beer parlour. Papa wey dey run from debt—abeg, na wah for that kind family."

Some people go even shake head, dey form say dem holy pass. "I pity Morayo, to sit with person like that. If na me, I for just disappear."

Laughter just waka round the class.

Laughter wey dey pain, the kain one wey go reach person bone. Some people dey slap desk, some dey point finger. I just lock my jaw, dey press my leg for floor.

Na me be the main person for all these talk, but na Morayo face even show pass mine.

Even as dem dey talk, Morayo just dey twist her finger for her hair, like person wey dey reason how e go affect am. Her eye dey shine, she dey form innocent.

I never talk anything, but Morayo just look teacher with pity face, dey beg for me. "Teacher, Zainab no do am on purpose, abeg forgive her this time, she no go try am again."

Her voice dey soft, almost dey shake. She press her hand for chest, dey look teacher straight, as if she dey try use eye do magic for am.

"Her family no get money. If you seize her phone, her mama go vex for am."

As she talk that one, some people for class hiss, others dey look me like say I na charity case. That kain talk dey always sweet teacher ear, but this one just pour petrol join fire.

I no even know when me and Morayo become close reach like that.

True true, I no fit remember the day. Na only say, since I come, she dey sit beside me, dey ask for homework, dey borrow pen. Maybe na pity, maybe na something else. I just dey reason am, my chest dey hot.

Her begging just make teacher vex more. He knock my table. "Poor no mean say you go dey misbehave or break school law. Even beggar no dey thief."

That knock loud, my water bottle shake fall. Some people for class even jump. The words enter me like cold water for harmattan.

The meaning clear: I no reach beggar level.

Na the kind insult wey dey low-key but strong. I just dey look my desk, dey count scratch for wood.

He give me last warning. "Bring am come out. No let me talk am again."

Everybody dey wait to see how I go do. Some people dey hide smile, others dey bite pen.

I say, "I no dey play phone."

I try talk am with strong face, but my voice low, almost like whisper. My heart dey pound, my mind dey fly up and down.

He no gree, think say I just dey struggle like grasshopper for end of dry season.

Teacher face strong, like say he don see people like me before. He dey sure say I dey lie, no even blink.

"You dey lie. If you no dey play, why Morayo go warn you?"

He talk am like say the matter don end. Even the backbenchers dey nod head.

Morayo hold my sleeve, dey panic. "Zainab, abeg give am. Teacher don vex."

Her voice low, she dey bite lip. She no wan wahala reach her side, but she dey do as if she dey care. Her hand cold for my arm.

She dey form say she dey pity me, but na she dey put fire join.

Her face dey squeeze, like say she no like wetin dey happen, but she dey look teacher for eye, dey push me small small.

Teacher open my locker by force, all my books scatter for ground. He tell Morayo to check my bag.

The locker make kpa sound as e open. My books, notes, one small handkerchief fall scatter for ground. Morayo dey shiver as she bend, dey open my bag with slow hand.

Morayo nearly cry, stuck between two wahala, come dey apologize, "Sorry, Zainab."

Her face dey red, her hand dey shake as she open every zip. She dey whisper, "Sorry, sorry." E be like say she no sure who to fear pass: teacher or me.

She search my bag well.

She carry my bag, dey turn am upside down. Even my biro pack and empty sweet wrapper she check, her hand dey tremble.

Loose thread, ink stain—she search everywhere, no leave any place.

She dey complain for herself, "Ah, this one stubborn o." She check the small inside pocket, shake out dust, her face dey squeeze.

When she no see anything, she bend go check my locker basket. She throw away all the books inside till everywhere empty.

Books just dey fly for floor, my assignment dey scatter. Everybody dey look. Some people dey snap with their eyes, dey gist for low voice.

Now, na her own panic start, her face just dey dull, the sharp smile for her eyes begin fade.

Morayo look teacher, mouth open small. Her hand dey her chin, like say she dey calculate how wahala go reach her.

Teacher help her remember, "E fit dey her body?"

His voice dey impatient, he eye dey flash. Some people for class begin murmur, dey wait make drama get another level.

So she rush begin search my body, check my cuffs, pockets, everywhere—but still, nothing.

Her hand dey rough as she check my cuffs, even try check my socks. I stand gidigba, just dey look ceiling. I dey shame but I gats strong face.

Teacher phone ring, so he leave us, waka comot go answer call.

As he waka comot, the tension drop small. Some people laugh, others dey form like nothing happen. For my mind, I dey count seconds, dey wish say ground go open.

The class, wey dey hot before, just cold. Everybody dey wait to see me shame, but now dem no see anything.

You fit feel the eye wey dey follow me everywhere. Silence full the air, only clock for wall dey tick.

But dem still believe say I play phone.

Na that kind wahala wey, even if you innocent, once dem mark your face, wahala go dey follow you like stubborn stain.

Dem blame am say na because I smart and Morayo cover up for me.

Some people dey whisper say Morayo dey protect me, because we dey share answers for test. Others dey shake head, dey form detective.

Dem talk say Morayo hide the phone for herself to help me.

Rumour dey fly, people dey look us two, dey measure who fit thief pass. Some dey smile like say dem sabi the full gist.

I squat down, dey pack my books wey scatter, as Morayo dey step on top am one by one.

Each book I pick, sand dey my hand. Morayo high heel step on my notebook, she just waka pass like say she no know. I just dey pack my things in silence—na that day I know say for this class, my name don spoil.

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