Chapter 5: Mama, I Go Follow You

Mama shock. The pain for her face strong, like say cold water pour for her body.

She bend down, hold my shoulders, her eyes dey pain, talk serious: Her grip dey firm, tears dey hide for corner of her eye.

“No be you. Na Papa fault. He no suppose lie give Ijeoma, make her think say na really her papa, and he no suppose dey pet another person pikin, leave him own daughter. You no do anything wrong—na him make mistake. We no suppose dey here. Make we go house.” Her voice dey carry me like warm blanket, I begin calm.

She pack up sharp sharp, carry me go Uncle house. We no talk, just dey move, our bag small, our hope big.

Uncle welcome us well. He open gate wide, smile dey his face, "Una welcome o! Na your house be this."

He see the pain for Mama face, promise say he go fight for her. He touch her shoulder, "Amina, no let dem try am. I dey your back."

Mama try stop am. She dey beg, "No let wahala too much, abeg."

But he say, na her brother, he no go ever let person bully her. His face strong, his voice sure, "Na me and you dey this fight."

He go health centre—he no come back that night. His phone no dey go, we dey worry.

Me and Mama stay for Uncle house three days. For those three days, wahala pause, peace small enter our life.

For those three days, Mama take leave for me, I no go school. She say make I rest, make my head cool.

We dey together. We dey cook, laugh, play small game, sometimes just dey sit for silence.

We dey look cloud, morning dew, spring flower, night light. She dey point, "See as God make everything beautiful."

Na rare peace for our life. Even rain wey fall dey sound sweet, no be like wahala.

Three days later, Uncle come back. His face don change, eye red, clothes rough.

He look tired, his eyes dey dodge, come talk wetin break person heart: His voice low, e dey shake.

“Amina, you fit leave Aisha make she rest? She sick…”

I look Uncle, shock, no fit talk. My mouth open, my heart dey race.

Mama shock too. Her hand dey her mouth, she dey tremble.

That day, Mama tell me make I go my room, stay alone small. Her voice dey gentle, "Go rest, Yaya, Mama need small time."

She and Uncle shout for parlour. The voice loud, I dey peep from my door.

Not too long, she carry me commot Uncle house, her face strong. She no look back, just dey march forward.

We just dey waka for city. City big, but nowhere to call home. We waka pass shop, pass street, sun dey hot.

As we pass flower shop, Mama buy white lilies. The flowers fresh, she hold am like say na gold.

We go Grandma grave. Cemetery dey quiet, bird dey sing for mango tree, breeze dey blow small dust.

Mama put the lilies, cry well. Her tears mix with dust, her voice low, she dey pray.

She talk, “Mama, abeg forgive me. I suppose hear you that time.” Her head bend, pain dey everywhere for her body.

I don hear Aunty Kemi tell Mama and Papa love story: one big oga, one small innocent girl—two people from different world fall in love, become couple. She dey use her voice draw picture of better life, but now, I dey reason say e no true.

Aunty Kemi dey envy them, say na fairy tale for real life. She go talk, "Una lucky pass, God join una together."

But fairy tale na lie. E just dey sweet for book, real life na another thing.

Just six years, another woman scatter their love. The thing dey pain, love no last reach.

I wan talk: Mama, abeg, make we go, divorce Papa—no look back. My mind dey push me, my mouth no gree open.

But I no fit talk am. I dey choke, my chest dey tight, my heart dey shout for inside.

Na like say clamp dey my mouth, I no fit breathe. The thing dey heavy, like stone for throat.

But Mama ask me, “Yaya, if I leave Papa, who you go follow?” Her voice dey test my heart.

That time, I feel hope. My eye dey shine, I dey see light for tunnel.

Pressure finally free me. My body relax, my tears rush come out.

I cry, vex and happy together. My mouth dey tremble, "I go follow you, Mama."

“I go follow you, Mama.” My voice sure, I hug her tight, no wan loose.

Mama hug me, her body strong with decision. She no shake, she dey sure.

She really go ask Papa for divorce. I dey follow her back, my heart dey beat fast.

But Papa just laugh am off. He dey wave hand, "Na drama you dey do, abeg."

He say, “Stop this drama. I dey find heart donor for Aisha. I no get time for this your wahala.” He just dey scroll him phone, no even look Mama face.

Mama no argue again. She just drop one word: “Sign the paper. I go leave. Nobody go disturb you.” Her voice cold, she no shout.

She carry me commot that house. Bag dey her hand, my own for my back, we dey waka for road.

But Grandma no gree. Her body dey block gate, her eye dey fire.

“Yaya na Musa family pikin. You fit go, but my granddaughter dey stay.” Her hand dey point, voice dey shake house.

Bodyguards come separate me from Mama by force. Two big men, hand like yam, drag me back. I dey scream, dey kick.

That time, I hate Grandma. My mind dey curse her, my mouth dey spit fire.

I scratch, bite, kick, fight with all my strength. My nail cut one guard, dem no even blink.

Mama fear. Her voice dey break, "Yaya, abeg. No hurt yourself. Never hurt yourself. I no go leave you. I no go ever leave you."

I realize: No. I no suppose be Mama burden. I fit see the worry for her eye, I no wan add more pain.

I stop the struggle. My body relax, tears dey pour.

“Mama, bye bye. I go wait for you to come back.” My voice low, but my hope dey strong.

I run go my room, lie down for window, dey look Mama. Her back dey bent, her hand dey shake.

She dey cry. The tears dey flow, she no wipe am.

She wipe her tears. She use her wrapper, rub face, try stand strong.

She look my window. I sharply hide. I dey fear to make eye contact, my heart dey bleed.

I hide for curtain, my heart dey beat like drum. I dey pray, "Make Mama no see my tears."

When I peep again, Mama don go. Empty street, only her shadow remain for my mind. Breeze dey carry Mama tears, sun dey set behind old mango tree.