Chapter 12: Ribo Crash—Last Laugh

Today na the day Ribo new feature dey launch.

Back then, I for dey Lagos office, dey fix last-minute bug. Now, na yacht breeze I dey enjoy.

Before, I go dey shake, dey watch launch event live.

My heart for dey beat like talking drum. But now, my mind dey calm like water.

Now, me and Pocky sit for deck, dey watch our fishing rod.

We dey gist about school, dey laugh about old days. Fishing line never move, but nobody dey rush.

“E don hook! E don hook! Pull am!”

Na Pocky shout first. I rush stand, hold rod, my hand dey shake small.

The pull from water strong. I balance, drag rod up with all my power.

Captain dey shout, “Balance am! Balance am!” I dey sweat.

1.2-meter sailfish!

Fish big pass my leg. Everybody dey shout. I no believe say I fit catch am.

Me, Pocky, and yacht captain—three grown men—dey shout like small pikin.

Our voice loud, even people from other yacht dey look us.

At last, I hold up sailfish, captain hold tape, Pocky snap picture.

My hand dey pain me, but pride full my chest. I dey pose like champion.

For the picture, I stand strong, my face dey tight.

Even for celebration, I still dey form hard guy. Pocky dey laugh me.

I go use this brag for one year.

I go print the picture, hang for house. Even my mama go proud.

That time, Pocky phone begin ring non-stop.

E look screen, shock. I dey reason say na family wahala.

E pick, hear small, shout, “Ah!”

The shout loud, e face change. I know say serious matter dey ground.

E run come: “Check headline news—now!”

E pass phone, finger dey shake. Na Ribo news everywhere.

I look him phone news feed.

I scroll fast—every headline dey scream my former company name.

Everywhere full with headline: “Ribo Don Crash, User Data Lost.”

Na real disaster. I fit feel the panic for news.

[Ribo new feature launch scatter, product just crash.]

I dey pity the people wey dey office now. Dem no go sleep today.

[CEO rush end launch, say dem dey repair, no know when e go finish.]

Na Musa voice I dey hear for news video—e dey sweat, e face dey red.

[People dey log in, dem see say their account don wipe clean.]

I dey imagine people dey shout for help desk, dey call customer care tire.

[Ribo product dey people life, dem dey pay membership, buy things for app. If user data lost, na big wahala for Ribo.]

All the vendors, partners—everybody dey panic. Stock market go hear am.

I know say matter bad. I wash hand, sit down read well.

As I dey clean hand, my mind dey work. I dey trace where problem fit start.

I watch launch event video, scroll user complaint for community.

Na so I dey analyse every line, dey connect dots. My engineer brain no dey rest.

Join am with the hidden wahala wey I know after upgrade, I begin trace code back...

Na now dem go understand who Kunle be. For Naija, no be by gra-gra, na who sabi fix wahala last last.