Chapter 2: Spirit Car, Spirit Buyer

As I reach funeral home, time don reach 11 p.m. I see the car—na the same BMW wey I sell give Ifedike. The front don scatter, but engine still dey okay. If dem repair am, e still fit sell.

Funeral home cold, the smell get as e be—mixture of Dettol and sorrow. For corner, mortuary man dey smoke, dey greet me with two finger salute.

I still see the dead body. Na Ifedike. The way he die bad—half of him head don cave in.

Body dey for black nylon. I see him phone for ground, WhatsApp chat still dey open. Life dey short, my brother.

I ask Baba Musa how e happen. Ifedike just dey my shop that morning—how come he die so quick?

Baba Musa talk say, na accident catch Ifedike for afternoon. He drink, then crash for Palm Avenue. Lucky say people no too dey road, else e for bad pass.

He add say, "Na blood dey everywhere. Police sef dey tire."

As I wan ask more, two women waka come. One na Halima. She dey laugh and gist with her friend, no even look like person wey lose anybody.

Dem dey talk about new hair, dey check phone. Na so life be—one man die, world still dey move.

Halima see me, greet me. "Oga, how much you go pay for this car?"

Her face straight, business no dey waste time. I dey wonder, na this woman I see dey cry for shop this morning?

Omo, I don see people, but Halima get mind. Ifedike never even cold, she don dey sell the car.

I no even know how she take arrange am. People dey fear corpse, but Halima—she dey talk price.

I bone face, "Halima, you dey rush sell car o. Ifedike never even do seven days. You no fear say him go come meet you for midnight to discuss car matter? And the car sef, e don enter your name?"

I use laugh cover am, but deep down, I dey serious. For Naija, dem dey say if you sell dead man property quick, e fit come visit you.

Halima just bone, "That coward no fit find me, even for death. He transfer car give me this morning. I wan consign am to dealership, but he get accident at noon. Just talk price. After one year plus with am, na only this car I get."

She dey count her loss, but I know say na only money dey her mind. Some women get heart wey fit squeeze stone.

Bride price, wedding house, still she dey complain. I really pity Ifedike.

For this life, no be everything wey person dey see with eye clear. Ifedike story go make man reason twice before e rush marry.

"I sell am to am for 4.5 million. Now wey he don die, I go buy am back same price."

For my mind, na fair deal. Make everybody go their way, no wahala.

I even dey lose for this one, but since the man don die, no need argue.

Wetin go I gain? At least, car go come back, wahala go end.

Halima happy. With the way the car scatter, she no expect to see full money. I tell her to come my shop next day for paper work. She agree, even dey praise me say I be better person, promise to send customer come.

Na so some people be—today fight you, tomorrow dey smile. Na market people dey call "customer service."

I shake head. "Halima, you believe for karma?"

I talk am low, make e no too pain her. E still shock me how quickly she forget the guy wey just die.

Halima freeze, then call me craze person, waka commot with her friend.

Her friend laugh, shout, "Na only you go dey do like mumu for this Aba!" Funeral home staff just dey glance at her with side-eye, whispering, 'Na wah for women of nowadays.'

One month after Ifedike die, I repair the BMW—the front cost me over 600k. Lucky say I buy am cheap, so after repair, small profit still dey.

Mechanic wey help me work, Sarki, dey always talk say, "Oga Shen, this kind car dey see plenty thing for road." I just dey laugh, as long as car dey move, I dey alright.

I just wan put the car for sale again, when one young man show for shop. He look like twenty years old, dey hang for outside before he enter.

I sabi this kind person, so I go meet am. "You dey find car, bro?"

From the way e dey look, e no too get money, but e sharp. Na so we dey know student hustle for Aba.

He nod, talk low, "Oga, I hear say na that kind car you dey sell."

His eye dey quick—na sharp guy, no dey waste word. I fit tell say e get matter for mind.

I just smile. "True, na accident cars I get. Come inside, make you sit down—I get different types."

I pour zobo for plastic cup, give am. As e sip, I see e dey calm. This na how we dey run business for here—if you dey buy car, you suppose cool down, talk well.

I make zobo for am. He talk say him name na Chijioke, say he need cheap car wey get small level for office run.

He no tell me full truth, but my spirit dey tell me say e get reason why e want accident car.

Na coincidence—I get the perfect one.

If to say na another day, I for no even reason am, but today—spirit dey move person.

"You come at the right time. I get one 2020 BMW X1 wey fit you. Condition still dey okay. So far, only two people don die inside—na the lowest body count for my shop."

I talk am with joke, make e no fear. Some people dey reason say if e never reach three, e no count as haunted.

He just blink. "How much?"

Na there I know say this guy get mind. Many go run from that kind gist, but e just dey check pocket.

The way he take react make me suspect. Most people dey fear when dem hear say people die for car, but Chijioke just dey reason price.

He dey calculate if e fit sell am next year, or just run small trip before wahala go show.

"4.5 million. You sure say na you go drive am?"

I eye am small. Sometimes, people dey buy for person wey dem no tell truth.

To talk true, after repair, na small profit I dey make for that price.

I dey reason if I fit push am reach 5 million, but today, no strength for long negotiation.

Chijioke pause, then talk sharp sharp, "Na me go drive am. Oga, fit reduce? 4 million nko?"

He no even waste time—na sharp bargainer. My mind cut, but I no show am.

"Bro, 2020 BMW X1—if no be say two people die, how e go cheap like this? I no go reduce anything. If e too cost, I get other cars. One even dey wey everybody inside die—only 1.6 million."

As I talk am, my apprentice dey hide laugh for corner—na only for Aba you go see this kind market.

Chijioke face change. He shake head. "No, na the BMW I want. I go buy am."

He dey rush, like person wey get deadline. Some kind people dey buy spirit car as if dem dey buy gala.

Deal go smooth. Chijioke do short test drive, add me for WhatsApp, then carry car go.

He drive out, play local music loud—one Igbo gospel song. For this town, people no dey waste time when dem see opportunity.

That afternoon, I just dey scroll WhatsApp Status for boredom. Wetin I see shock me: Chijioke post, "Congrats to my brother for getting a BMW."

My body cold. So na another person go chop am, and I no sure say him brother go fit handle car with wahala.

Chai, so na him brother he buy the car for. I just vex.

For this business, people dey lie, but this one pain me. Na so we dey lose trust for Naija street.

I message Chijioke: "Bro, why you buy the car for your brother?"

I even add voice note, but na blue tick I get. Before I fit type again, my message no dey deliver.

Instead of explain, he just block me.

This life, even blood brother fit run you street.

Sometimes, the people wey go do you pass, na those wey you dey help. Na street way be that.