Chapter 1: The Mysterious Answer Sheet

Inside that exam hall, where even a pin drop dey fear to make sound, I raised my hand sharp-sharp to call invigilator.

The silence in the air thick pass ogbono soup, as if everybody dey hold their breath. The sound wey my desk make as I raise my hand, e loud pass normal. My heart dey beat gbim-gbim. Exam tension plus wahala—double pressure. Sweat dey my armpit, even though the fan dey blow anyhow.

The invigilator waka come my side, face serious, and ask, "Wetin happen? You no understand the question or wetin?"

He bend reach my desk, lower him voice like teachers wey no wan disgrace you for public. The faint smell of Dettol dey his sleeve—he don wash hand well. Him eyes dey move from my face to my exam script, as if e dey expect gbege.

I look the teacher for eye, try do face like innocent pikin wey no sabi anything. "Sir, there's an answer sheet inside my locker."

Small shakiness enter my voice, make e be say na true I dey talk. My hand dey tremble as I point the locker. Some people for hall don dey peep me, dey reason whether I wan run mad cruise.

He scratched his head, hissed, and looked me up and down like say I be the first person to try this stunt. The other invigilator just raise shoulder—this one pass am.

Before long, I became the center of attention in the exam hall. I just pray make my village people no dey play with me today.

You know that kain feeling wey everybody dey use eyes dey burn your back? The hall turn to look, some even pause their writing. The girl behind me muttered, “Na wa o, this boy no dey tire for drama.” Somebody for back even whispered, “E fit be juju o.”

To avoid disturbing others, one invigilator carry me outside.

He hold my arm small, like papa wey suspect say you don break TV remote. Shoe shuffle and pencil scratch dey follow us as door close, block out the wahala inside.

Outside, the invigilator ask, "This answer sheet na your own?"

His eyes sharp like blade, dey find any sign of lie. Sweat dey for him forehead—whether sun or problem, I no sure.

"It's not mine, sir. It just appeared in my locker from nowhere."

My voice steady, but inside, fear dey catch me. Who go believe this kain story? I try talk like pikin wey never see expo before.

"If e no be your own, how e enter your locker? No be we tell everybody to check locker before exam?"

He raise him voice, as if shout go force truth come out. The wall gecko for window run commot. Corridor empty, na only junior block laughter dey far.

"I checked, I swear. This thing just appeared from thin air. And if it was really mine, why would I raise my hand to tell you about it?"

I open hand wide, shirt rise small. My voice dey beg, almost like prayer. "Oga, abeg, believe me. I no get time for wahala."

The invigilator pause, no talk for one minute.

He look me, look the paper, as if the answer sheet go confess by itself. For my mind, I dey fear say e fit call my mama straight.

Na that time chief invigilator, Mr. Okon, waka pass. He see us for corridor, face squeeze. "Wetin dey happen here? This candidate get problem?"

Mr. Okon waka with confidence, kaftan starch no dey allow am fold. Him face carry that kain frown wey mean gbege. He look us, dey wait.

"Oga, you come at the right time. This candidate say answer sheet just appear for him locker," the invigilator talk, give Mr. Okon the paper.

Voice dey respect, but eyes show say e wan drop the matter for oga head. Paper dey shake small for Mr. Okon hand.

Mr. Okon frown, check the answer sheet well, frown come deep pass before.

He adjust glasses, squint at the answers, flip some pages like say my name go dey shout there. Forehead wrinkle scatter.

He point the answer sheet at me, face strong: "Where you get this one?"

Voice deep, e get weight. E look me like say e fit melt iron.

I see say the matter serious, so I no put sugar for mouth. I stand well, talk, "It’s not mine. It just appeared out of thin air. If you no believe, you fit check the CCTV."

I stand kampe, chest out, stubbornness full body. My eyes no shift. Some people dey talk say I get 'juju confidence.' Today, I really need am.

"Check it! We must check it!" Mr. Okon shout, make both me and invigilator jump. E voice echo for the whole building.

People wey dey waka outside stop, dey peep inside. Mama Chi, cleaner wey dey mop corridor, drop her mop: "Kai, wahala don burst."

The invigilator quickly pull Mr. Okon aside.

He look me, like say I fit disappear. Them stand for pillar, voice low but body stiff. I shift leg, dey pretend say I no dey hear.

But as dem try talk low, I still dey hear small-small.

Breeze carry their gist come my side. My ear sharp like mama dey gossip for kitchen.

"Oga, this thing necessary so?"

"Not necessary? See this answer sheet—every answer correct!"

"Ha! E mean say question leak?"

"I'm telling you, this matter serious. Today na last WAEC paper. We no fit allow wahala. If we no handle am, dem fit sack us both!"

Mr. Okon voice dey rise, hand dey waka as e talk. The other teacher dey wipe sweat, nod head like lizard. I just dey look their drama.

So, the two of them carry me go CCTV room.

Dem waka me pass corridor like thief, but nobody laugh. My mind dey run—future dey hang for air.

After we don watch CCTV like ten times, dem finally believe me: answer sheet just appear for locker.

Screen dey play again and again. Invigilator scratch head tire, hair fit fall commot. Mr. Okon dey mumble, "Oluwa o, na which kind thing be this?" The invigilator even touched his head, muttering small prayer under breath. When footage end, their eyes meet my own, small pity dey show.

"Oga, wetin we go do now?"

Invigilator voice dey shake, hand dey rub chin. Even ceiling fan for up dey groan, like e tire for the matter.

"You dey ask me? I don invigilate twenty years, never see this kain wahala."

Mr. Okon shoulder fall. He look the CCTV like say advice go drop from there. For once, e resemble confused uncle.

"Maybe... we call police?"

The suggestion hang for air, heavy like harmattan. He bite lip, like say e regret am.

"Call police? You dey craze?" Mr. Okon eye the invigilator, then face me. "Oya, go back finish your exam."

He wave hand like fly dey disturb am. Invigilator squeeze mouth, mutter something about "village people."

I just roll eye for Mr. Okon. After all the delay, wetin remain make I write?

My brain scatter. I hiss small, arrange my tie, pick biro. Students dey look me like say I just come back from cell.

But I no wan wahala, so I follow invigilator go inside.

I waka gently, head low, shoe dey squeak. My seat cold pass before. My neighbor dey look me, pen hang for air.