Chapter 6: Becoming

Tanya, the girl from next door, loved playing with makeup—especially on other people. She’d already made over her whole dorm. Now, seeing my rookie efforts, she was excited.

Letting someone see all your flaws up close takes guts. But Tanya was genuinely sweet. She peered at my face and said, “I think you’re perfect for this new look I saw on YouTube.” She dove in: heavy eyeliner, dramatic lashes, contouring and highlighter everywhere.

When I looked in the mirror, I barely recognized myself. Tanya’s technique was only a notch above mine, but both of us were obsessed. We spent evenings watching beauty gurus, swapping tips, experimenting. After a few months, we found what suited us.

Tanya was a petite Southern girl; heavy makeup aged her, so she went for quirky, youthful looks. Me? My angular features came alive with bold, smoky eyes.

I pulled Tanya aside once. “Isn’t this too much? My mom and sister go for the natural look.”

Tanya just shrugged. “Who says there’s only one kind of pretty?”

She convinced me to get my hair done—short, ear-length, with streaks of purple. I looked like a whole new person. That summer, I came home for break and even the neighbors did a double take. “Is that Natalie?” they’d whisper over the backyard fence. “She really changed at college.”

My parents barely noticed. Derek and Aubrey had just broken up, and the whole house felt gloomy. Aubrey messaged me: “I should delete all Derek’s contacts, but before I do, I wanted to say goodbye.”

I wrote back, “Don’t delete me yet. I really loved your gift. Let me treat you to dinner.”

After a while, Aubrey replied, “Okay.” She looked me up and down when we met. “I like your hair. You’ve grown up a lot.”

Halfway through dinner, her friends called. She took me along, introducing me as “my ex’s sister, but she’s got cool vibes, so be nice.”

We piled into two SUVs and drove to a fancy resort outside town. The only guy there was Aubrey’s cousin, Noah—a soft-spoken junior at NYU, obsessed with photography. He ended up taking photos for everyone.

When he finished, he called out to me: “Natalie, stand in that sunbeam.”