Chapter 2: Too Close for Comfort

After that day, I deliberately kept my distance from Mason.

When he finished class, I did practice problems. When he ate, I did practice problems. I kept up the routine, even if it hurt.

Two weeks went by. At first, he still brought me dinner every night, but as he realized I was serious, he started showing up less and less. Now I only saw him occasionally during break, and his eyes looked hurt, like a kicked puppy.

I steeled myself and pretended not to see.

It was harder than I thought—ignoring him felt like holding my breath for weeks.

A few more days passed, and I heard their fitness assessments were coming up. He’d be fine.

I wasn’t worried. In my previous life, he did great. Because of me, he worked extra hard on academics so we could go to the same college—even switching from his dream sports university to my school’s athletics department. It still makes my chest ache to think about it.

This time, I wouldn’t let that happen.

The next time I saw Mason was after their fitness assessments.

Everyone was in a good mood—the whole team did well, and Mason scored especially high. It stung a little, seeing him so happy without me, but I was proud of him.

It was gym class again. As I was heading downstairs, I ran into him coming up.

He looked happy and immediately shared, “Lila, I got a 97 on the assessment!”

His voice was so full of pride I couldn’t help but smile. “Congrats.” My smile felt real for once, genuinely happy for him.

My voice always sounded a bit cool, but when I softened it, it was gentle. He always noticed the difference.

Maybe it was the half-month apart, or maybe it was just hot outside, but his face seemed to flush. I couldn’t help noticing. He cleared his throat. “You guys have gym now?”

“Yeah, I’ve got to go.” I brushed past him, and I could feel him turning to look at me. Part of me wanted to turn around, but I kept walking.

But I didn’t look back, just clenched my fists.

Keeping this distance was for the best. No matter how much it sucked.

But I couldn’t stay cool for more than three seconds. Seriously, what was wrong with me?

Maybe I was just too used to relying on him. Did I even know how to stop?

I forgot about my period, so when I stubbornly walked past him without looking back, he grabbed me. *Smooth, Lila. Real smooth.*

I turned, confused, but first noticed everyone else’s eyes darting away. My stomach dropped.

Then I realized everyone was staring at my backside.

Realizing what was happening, my face burned with embarrassment. *Kill me now.*

But then I felt a warm arm around my waist.

It was summer, and he wasn’t wearing a jacket, so he just hugged me, shielding me from view. *Of course he would.*

He cleared his throat, sounding fierce. “What are you all staring at? Move along!”

People around us looked at us with teasing looks. My face turned bright red. *Could this get any worse?*

His body was hot against my waist, sending a jolt straight to my heart.

What was he doing?

There were plenty of people coming and going, but before I could react, he scooped me up and carried me down the stairs, heading for the dorms. My brain short-circuited.

I buried my face in his chest, mortified.

*Forget the dorm—just send me to another planet, please.*

When we reached the dorm, he set me down, serious. “Go up and change your pants. I’ll go buy you some chocolate.”

I was already numb and just nodded. *Just let me disappear.*

*Whatever. There was no one left at this school I cared about anyway.*

Seeing how miserable I looked, he actually laughed, pinched my cheek, and teased, “It’s totally normal to have your period. You dork—you don’t even keep track of your own cycle.”

His tone was so familiar, it was like the past half-month of distance had never happened. It made my heart ache all over again.

I stared at him, my heart pounding uncontrollably.

Then the sadness returned. Why couldn’t things ever be simple?

*If this kept up, I’d lose my mind.*

I looked up at him, forcing a smile. “Then you keep track for me from now on, okay?”

He seemed surprised I’d say that, but then answered, almost like it was obvious, “I already do. Last month was the 18th, and today’s…”

He trailed off as I tiptoed up and clapped my hand over his mouth, both embarrassed and annoyed. “You do realize that’s something only really close people do?!”

“I’m your brother—isn’t that close enough?” he said, pulling my hand down.

Brother. Brother.

Inside, I was crawling in the dark, but on the outside, I smiled even more gently. “Alright, thanks, big brother.”

I deliberately made my voice soft and sweet when I called him brother, hoping to stir up some other feeling in him. But the next second, he just put his big hand on my head and patted me. “I’ve waited so many years for you to finally call me brother!”

He looked so satisfied, like a proud dad. Seriously?

Me: “...”

I ended up skipping gym that day.

Mason skipped class too, made me hot chocolate, and even bought me heat packs. *He really was impossible.*

He fussed over me like an old married couple, and I couldn’t help but feel a bittersweet ache in my chest. It was sweet and painful at the same time.

When I got back to the classroom, everyone stared like they were dying to gossip.

Kayla, my desk mate, nudged me. “Everyone in our grade knows about you and Mason. When are you two making it official?”

*Go public?*

I waited my whole last life and never got that. How could it happen now?

She got anxious. “Mason’s such a catch! Aren’t you afraid someone else will snatch him away?”

I paused, thinking back. In my last life, whether in college or after graduation, I never saw Mason get close to any other girl. Not once. It was always just us.

But maybe that made me feel entitled, like being close meant I’d get what I wanted. In the end, it was all just an illusion. *It always was.*

I brushed it off. “He’s busy with exams. He doesn’t have time for that.”

Kayla was disappointed not to get a straight answer, but didn’t press. I could feel her eyes on me, though.

The last class that afternoon was history. Halfway through, a sudden summer rainstorm hit, and by the time class ended, it hadn’t let up.

The storm pounded against the windows, and the air was thick with the smell of wet pavement. Remembering what Mason said last time, Kayla didn’t wait for me this time. Not that I blamed her.

I sat quietly, not wanting to go find Mason. I just wanted to be alone for a bit.

The higher the hopes, the harder the fall. I’d tasted that pain before. *And I was done with it.*

“Didn’t bring an umbrella? You can borrow mine.” Suddenly, a clear voice came from behind me.

I turned to see Tyler Brooks, the guy who sat behind me—clean-cut and a top student.

He had a gentle smile and an easy confidence. I hadn’t paid much attention to him before, just knew he’d sat behind me from freshman to senior year. Funny how you can miss someone right next to you.

“What about you?” I asked instinctively.

He scratched his head and smiled. “I’m a guy, I’ll be fine. If—just if—you’re headed the same way, you could walk me to the cafeteria. My friend’s there.”

*I almost laughed.*

It was his umbrella, but he made it sound like I was the one lending it. Cute.

I nodded. “Let’s go together.”

“Okay.”

We walked out together and ran into Mason coming to find me.

His eyes landed on Tyler beside me, his brows furrowing. “Lila, you’re going with him?”

Maybe it was my imagination, but he stared at me like he was afraid I’d say yes. Was he actually worried?

My heart fluttered. Did he care if I was close to other guys? *Was this finally a sign?*

*Did that mean…*

I looked at him, testing: “Yeah, we’re headed the same way.”

Mason’s expression froze.

But inside, I felt a strange excitement. Was I finally getting through to him?

But then—

“Alright, I’ve got something to do anyway. I’ll go first.”

With that, Mason didn’t look at me again and left. Just like that.

His words felt like a bucket of cold water dumped over my head. My heart dropped, and I didn’t even notice how tightly he was clenching his fists. *Figures.*

“You like him, don’t you?”

The sudden question snapped me out of it. I glanced at Tyler and didn’t deny it. “So even you can tell. But he doesn’t like me.”

*I let out a sigh.*

I knew it would end like this. Why was I still hoping for a miracle? *Stupid, Lila.*

I could’ve asked my roommates to bring me food for evening study, but I couldn’t let it go, so I made a point of walking out with Tyler. Maybe I just wanted to see if Mason would care.

Tyler paused. “He doesn’t like you? No way. He’s not a kid—he knows the boundaries between guys and girls. Either he likes you and doesn’t realize it, or he’s a jerk playing with your feelings. Lila, wake up.”

*My eyes widened.*

He wouldn’t play with my feelings, so maybe he just didn’t realize he liked me? Is that possible? Could he really be that clueless?

In my last life, I’d tried, but he always brushed it off, thinking my feelings were just sisterly dependence. Whenever I said something, he’d just humor me, saying I was his favorite. Eventually, I stopped wasting my efforts.

But thinking back, he never had any other girls around, and treated me better than even his own family. Why didn’t I see it before?

*Maybe he was just clueless?*

After that awkward encounter, Mason seemed busier than ever. Even though his class was right next door, he didn’t come by like before. I noticed every absence.

I had other things on my mind, but nothing came of it. I tried to focus, but it was hard.

By now, he should be busy with academics. Still, I wondered if he was thinking about me too.

But this time, he didn’t have to work so hard to get into my college, so he shouldn’t be under as much pressure. Maybe he was finally free to chase his own dreams.

Mason’s grades in regular subjects weren’t great, but his athletic stats were stellar. Between his performance and recruiting interest, getting into his dream school wouldn’t be hard.

I only thought about it briefly before diving back into my studies. No sense in obsessing.