I’m Not Her: Loving in Shadow / Chapter 5: The Goodbye That Hurts
I’m Not Her: Loving in Shadow

I’m Not Her: Loving in Shadow

Author: Rebecca Anderson


Chapter 5: The Goodbye That Hurts

← Prev

Half a month later, Chris came back to Maple Heights.

I put on my flashiest dress, hair full of jeweled pins. Remembering David’s look of horror at my style, I took a few out.

Just as I was about to head to the hospital, my crush showed up at the door.

Chris looked even more tanned, and—get this—actually wore a shirt that looked ironed. At the gate, he nodded politely. “Miss Mason, could I see Mr. Whitlock?”

What?

Could it be… they really are together?

Fuming, I stomped to the study. David, if you’re gutsy enough to steal my man, open this door!

David took his sweet time finishing paperwork, straightening his tie, and only after a good ten minutes did he let Chris in.

The two of them talked privately for half an hour while I paced outside, losing my mind.

Two guys who could kill a conversation in minutes—what could they possibly discuss for that long? Must be true love.

When the door finally opened, they came out side by side, their auras matching—even their grumpy faces were in sync.

Chris walked right past me. I tried to stop him, but David’s icy glare glued me in place.

At the gate, Chris stopped and looked back at me. Was that a soft look? Or was I just dreaming?

His voice was deep and clear. “Miss Mason, next month I’ll be heading south to work with some master physicians. Would you like to come with me?”

I—I must be dreaming. I pinched myself hard. Ow.

Fireworks exploded in my brain.

Just as the sparks faded, David coldly ordered the housekeeper, “Lock her up.”

I demanded to know when I’d be let out. He said, “When Chris leaves Maple Heights.”

I tried picking locks and sneaking out, but he had guards everywhere.

I argued with him—he just stared at me, unmoved.

I cried, threw tantrums, even threatened to run away. He took away all sharp objects and rope, totally unfazed.

I’m usually a wimp, but I decided to go for broke. Hunger strike.

David sent me all my favorite foods—mac and cheese, roast chicken, apple pie. He knew exactly how to get to me. I swear, the man’s a mind reader. My mouth watered, but I held out.

By day two, I was dizzy with hunger, counting the hours, waiting for him to give in.

He showed up with a bowl of chicken noodle soup. I hid under the covers, ignoring him.

He sat by my bed in silence for ages, then finally sighed.

“Drink the soup, then go.”

I shot up, all pretense gone, and gulped down the soup.

It was warm—I’d been craving it since he walked in. Hunger strikes are just dumb.

He looked exhausted, staring at the maple leaf on his shirt. I noticed a little burn on his finger from the soup bowl. He never complains.

I handed him the empty bowl, and he pulled out a slip of paper—my guardianship papers.

He leaned over, held it to the lamp, and burned it. The fire danced in his eyes.

The flames licked his fingers before he jerked his hand away.

“Does it hurt?”

He nodded.

My heart squeezed. David’s like a block of hardwood—never admits to pain.

Five days later, in a light drizzle, I left Maple Heights with Chris. David had prepared everything for my trip, silently holding Ben’s hand as he saw me to the gate.

I hoisted my bag. David patted Ben’s shoulder and pointed at me. The little guy shuffled over, dazed, and I hugged him tight.

I waved goodbye. David nodded, just barely.

He didn’t say a word to me that day.

I walked through the misty spring rain, side by side with Chris.

At the end of the driveway, I looked back—David stood alone, one hand holding Ben, the other braced on the gatepost.

So thin, so alone.

I couldn’t help but stop.

Chris’s eyes were deep. “Let’s go, Miss Mason.”

“You’ll come back.”

And the rain kept falling, blurring the old house behind us, as if the past was finally letting go—just a little.

This chapter is VIP-only. Activate membership to continue.
← Prev

You may also like

His Shadow Over My Heart
His Shadow Over My Heart
4.8
Autumn Reed is ready to walk away from the man she’s secretly loved for years, but her resignation sets off a chain of painful memories and unresolved longing. As she faces the emptiness of her own life and the ghosts of her past, one fateful night reveals just how deep her connection to Mason Caldwell truly runs—and what it will cost her to finally let go.
Six Years Chasing His Shadow
Six Years Chasing His Shadow
4.9
Six years loving Harrison Lee turned Savannah into his silent shadow—a loyal friend, never his choice. But when a sunset Instagram story reveals a new girl in his life, Savannah's world cracks. She watches him slip away, their routines dissolving into silence and her heart into envy. As Harrison’s affection shifts to someone from a world she’ll never belong to, Savannah is forced to confront bitter truths about class, pride, and letting go. When a stormy night puts her face-to-face with Harrison and his new girlfriend, Savannah must choose: keep chasing the love that never chose her, or finally step into the light and write her own ending. If love was never hers to claim, what is she willing to fight for now—and what will she become when she finally stops running after someone who never looked back?
I Chose My Shadow, Lost My Heart
I Chose My Shadow, Lost My Heart
5.0
Love isn’t safe—not in a city where loyalty is currency and betrayal is the price of survival. Autumn Langley, the Mayor’s only daughter, rules the shadows as the Governor’s covert agent, but when she chooses Eli Warren—a boy with haunted eyes and a past soaked in blood—to be her protector, she invites danger and desire into her world. Their bond is forged through violence, secrets, and years of unspoken longing, but as politics turn deadly and old ghosts rise, Autumn must decide if she’ll sacrifice everything for the boy who swore to follow her to the end. When her loyalty is tested by the city’s most ruthless powerbroker, and love becomes a weapon, can she save Eli—or will the truth destroy them both? When the knives are drawn, who will survive the storm: the strategist, the shadow, or the heart that refused to surrender?
I Loved Him—But He Let Me Go
I Loved Him—But He Let Me Go
4.9
He told me to move on—so I did. Ten years of loving Autumn Sullivan ended in a single rainy night in Chicago, when Lila Sawyer finally realized she was just a backup plan for the boy she’d loved since childhood. But as she struggles to let go, a new presence—Dr. Morgan, her quietly protective tutor—steps out from the shadows, offering the kind of steadfast affection she’s never known. Now, caught between the ghost of a first love and the promise of something real, Lila must find the courage to claim her own happiness. When old wounds collide with new beginnings, can she finally leave the past behind—or will heartbreak follow her into the spring rain?
He Loved Her, I Loved Him
He Loved Her, I Loved Him
4.8
Love was supposed to be forever—but for Lillian, devotion was never enough. Raised by the Whitmores and destined to marry Harrison, she spent her life chasing a man whose heart belonged to someone else. When the woman from his past returns, Lillian is left behind in a snowstorm, her world shattering as she uncovers the truth: Maple Heights was never truly hers. As Harrison’s cold indifference collides with Julia’s haunting presence, Lillian must decide if freedom is worth the heartbreak. But when secrets surface and a single call changes everything, can anyone truly escape the past—or is some love impossible to erase?
He Loved Her, Not Me
He Loved Her, Not Me
4.9
He loved her—just not me. On the night of our fourth anniversary, I watched Carter Langley slip further away, his heart claimed by another while our marriage became nothing but a headline. I was supposed to smile, play the perfect wife, and pretend not to notice the pitying looks or the silence that suffocated our home. But pain demands a witness. When betrayal cuts deeper than bone, how far will a woman go to make her absence felt? Carter’s indifference is legendary—until my final act leaves him with a haunting question and a secret he can never bury. If love is dead, what’s left for the living to regret?
I Loved Him in Every Lifetime
I Loved Him in Every Lifetime
4.8
A single act of mercy binds Lila, an ordinary fisher girl, to the world of Maple Heights’ most powerful family. Haunted by fragments of another life—and a love that left her in the shadows—she finds herself thrust into a battle of inheritance, secrets, and whispered betrayals. As the new heir ascends and old wounds resurface, Lila faces an impossible choice: reach for the love that destroyed her once before, or settle for safety in a world that never wanted her to belong. When survival means giving up her heart, will Lila finally break the cycle—or be forced to relive her heartbreak again?
I Loved His Other Self
I Loved His Other Self
5.0
Love wasn’t supposed to be this complicated. For two years, Mariah kept her relationship with Lucas hidden—Lucas, the secret self of Julian Carter, her enigmatic classmate. When Julian’s therapy threatens to erase Lucas forever, Mariah is forced to choose between healing and heartbreak. Every memory, every touch, is haunted by the knowledge that loving Lucas means losing him. As the past and present collide, Mariah faces a cruel truth: some goodbyes are final, and some loves never let go. When Julian reappears years later, a single glance brings back everything she tried to forget. Can you ever truly move on from the ghost of your first love—or are some promises, like paper flowers, made to last forever?
He Loved Me, Even After Death
He Loved Me, Even After Death
4.9
Death wasn’t the end for Emma Parker—it was just the beginning of a nightmare she couldn’t wake from. Haunted by shifting shadows, a missing cat, and neighbors who remember her life all wrong, Emma tries to rebuild after tragedy—until a ghostly wedding plunges her into a world of paper people, forbidden rituals, and a love that refuses to let go. As her grieving parents fight the living and the dead to rescue her soul, Emma must confront the truth: sometimes the scariest hauntings are the ones we carry with us. Will she break free from a love that followed her beyond the grave, or is she doomed to be a bride in the afterlife forever? When the boundary between worlds thins, who will say goodbye—and who will hold on too tight?
The Love That Wasn't Mine
The Love That Wasn't Mine
4.8
Lila, a young dance instructor, becomes entangled in the shadow of her boyfriend Ethan’s bittersweet past when she discovers his ex-wife’s Instagram, triggering a spiral of doubt and longing. As secrets and heartbreak surface, Lila must confront the reality that love’s most intense moments are not always hers to claim. In the end, she chooses self-worth and hope, while Ethan reflects on what was lost—and what might still be possible.
I Was His Ghost—Until She Lied
I Was His Ghost—Until She Lied
4.9
Love doesn’t end with death—it lingers, haunts, and sometimes, it fights back. When Ellie dies young, she leaves behind three hidden necklaces and a promise that keeps her beloved Mason tethered to life. But three years later, as Mason begins to smile again beside a new, sunny heroine, Ellie’s spirit discovers a darker truth: her death wasn’t fate—it was orchestrated. Now, trapped between worlds and powerless to warn Mason, Ellie must watch as the woman who replaced her hides a ruthless secret, and a sinister system rewrites the ending of their story. If love means letting go, what happens when the truth refuses to stay buried? Will Mason ever learn what really tore them apart—or will Ellie fade, forgotten, as the past claws its way back into the light?
I Loved Her Wrong, Then Lost Her
I Loved Her Wrong, Then Lost Her
4.9
He never knew her touch was a plea for help—until it was too late. When Autumn Reed dies, Logan is left with nothing but regrets and the diary that reveals every secret she hid. Grief and guilt tear him apart, until an impossible twist: he wakes up on their wedding night, staring at the woman he lost. Now, with fate handing him a do-over, Logan must break through Autumn's icy defenses and his own haunted past, even as his ex-girlfriend returns with her own desperate promises. Can he unravel the truth behind Autumn's silent suffering before history repeats itself? Or is love doomed to slip through his fingers twice?